Review NaN of 1
, from Chattanooga, TN
Price Paid:
$30.00
from Biddily Bal-Mart Summary:
Hey kids,
Many of you may be too young to remember the golden age of video gaming. Sitting in front of a giant floor model television, drinking super-sweetened crunchy Kool-aid, pounding away on the buttons of the NES until a permanent square controller corner was indented into your palm (of your hand, not pilot, you whippersnappers).
This, kiddies, was a time when the phrase "challenging" meant something. Nowadays, most video games present really pretty, ornate graphics, a whole slew of buttons that do nifty things and not much else.
Those who share my fond memories of sunbaked summer days, where your skin was so burnt, your mom FINALLY let you come inside, where there was only the option of sweating and watching 15 channel television OR sweating and playing the NES, will also remember "the challenge."
The games weren't complex. The graphics weren't hyper-realistic. And the games weren't fifty bucks a pop. But by-cracky we were thrilled!
Well, for the old-timers of my generation of gamers (I'm 21), the challenge is back.
Splinter Cell for the GBA has proven to be quite the little time machine. Knowing when to run, walk, shoot, jump, etc., it's all there. Not unlike the Mario games of yore, this game tests your skills with classic hand-eye challenges like running to the edge, and if you don't tap jump at the precise pixel, IMMINENT DOOM AWAITS! Just like the games of bygone times, timing and precision are key. Remembering patterns is an essential. Critical thinking is the element which breeds all life. In short, you will make the same dumb mistake 400 times before you get it right. But beware, unlike the NES controllers, the GBA will not survive a hard toss across the room.
Side note: What the he** did they make those NES controllers with? I bought my NES 17 years ago and those controllers are still performing at their peak. I have a major hair-trigger temper which resulted in at least 10 controller slams a day. These bad boys don't show any battle damage. Modern system controllers can't even survive a small bump, let alone 17 years of brutal, sadistic torture. Why haven't the major automotive corporations made an attempt at making a car out of that precious polymer, Nintendocontrollerium?
Anywho, Splinter Cell might not please the new crop of gamers who have the "Bigger is better" mentality, but for old school gamers with the patience and determination of the lioness awaiting the precise moment to pounce from the bushes at their potential num-nums, this game is what we've been missing ever since the world went digital on us. Report this review >>
| 
5 of 5
